Dear Mr. Bezos

Dear Mr. Bezos,

I hope all is well.

I know you are busy with the whole HQ2 thing (BTW very smart stringing it along, great free publicity for you guys), the Whole Foods acquisition, and the collaboration with JP Morgan and Mr. Buffett to transform the American health care system.

However, I need your help with something.

Daddy needed a new pair of gym shoes, so on February 7th, I went on Amazon and ordered myself a sweet pair of Adidas.

A couple days later (Amazon Prime is awesome BTW), I received an automated message from my condo that they had arrived.

Excellent!  Not excellent…when I opened up the box, I realized they were 2.5 sizes too big.

Ok, ‘everyone makes mistakes’ I said to myself, even the venerable Amazon.com.  So, I went back online and placed another order.

A couple days later, I received another automated message from my condo that a package had arrived (my shoes).

Great!  Not great…once again I was sent shoes that were 2.5 sizes too big.

At this point I was getting slightly frustrated, so I proceeded to go online and chat with an Amazon customer service rep who could not have been more lovely, apologetic and helpful.

The last part of our chat is below:

As you read, Shyam escalated the issue and promised that I would in fact receive the correct item this time.  I felt relieved and assured after our chat that your crackerjack distribution team would not make the same mistake for a 3rd time.

Fast forward to this morning, I received another automated call that a package had arrived.

So I went down and got the box, brought it back upstairs and opened it…BOOM!

Fantastic!  Nope…not fantastic.  You see I wear a size 7 and once again you guys sent me 9.5s.  (I know what you are thinking Jeff – ‘you know what they say about guys with small feet!’  Don’t even go there bro, I am simply not in the mood).

So, let me give you a current glimpse of my living room:

No, I haven’t sent any of them back yet, I figure I might as well send them all back at once to save myself multiple trips to USPS.  However, at this rate I am thinking I may need to go rent one of these badboys when it’s time:

Since this is a self-improvement blog and I am a glass half-full kind of guy, I have been trying to look on the bright side and turn this into a teachable lesson for our readers.

So, here goes…I think there are times in life where something happens, and you need to just go with it.  Call it fate, call it a sign, call it an omen – whatever.

That being said, I am thinking this whole thing is a sign that I may need to investigate other potential career opportunities.  So, I have spent the better part of the morning doing some research and am seriously contemplating enrolling in the following program:

I figure I already have 3 pairs of proper shoes, and I just went on Amazon and purchased the second piece of my new work uniform:

Lucky for me the nose is one size fits all!

My future occupation aside, up and coming clowns need their exercise too, so I still do need proper fitting running shoes.  Plus time is money (given your latest investment I am sure you will agree)

I was wondering if you could pull some strings and make sure your team ensures that the 4th time is the charm for me.

Let me know.

Thanks, give my best to MacKenzie and the kids and remember…Prime Your Pump!
– Rick Melnyck aka Giggles the Clown

P.S.  Seeing as how you are already here, feel free to snoop around the blog.  We have some entertaining and actionable content you may enjoy!

Use It or Lose It!

  Sometimes things happen in life and you just have to take them as a sign and go with your gut!

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