Lessons from Tuesdays with Morrie That Will Make You Think

Mitch Albom could not believe what he was hearing – so much so that he went numb when he heard it.  It was back in the Spring of 1995 and Albom, then a sports columnist at the Detroit Free Press was home on a Friday night watching Nightline with Ted Koppel. The show began with Koppel sitting behind his desk in Washington, D.C…

“Who is Morrie Schwartz?” Koppel asked the nationwide audience…

“and why, by the end of the night, are so many of you going to care about him?” ¹

Well, it turns out that Morrie Schwartz was a former sociology professor and mentor to Albom when he attended Brandeis University. Albom had lost touch with Schwartz since graduating 16 years earlier after getting wrapped up in his career and post-college life.

Koppel had traveled to Boston to interview Schwartz who the previous summer had been diagnosed with amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS) also known as Lou Gehrig’s disease. ALS is “a brutal, unforgiving illness of the neurological system” ¹ that is terminal.  It is a disease that melts your nerves and often starts at your legs and works its way up your body. The result is that you lose functionality of your legs first, then you cannot sit up straight and eventually you are breathing through a tube and often can only blink. Typically, all this awful stuff happens within 5 years of your contracting the disease.

Amazingly, Schwartz had an incredible attitude…

…and decided that he would make death his last project and the focus of his final days.

As Albom wrote, “Since everyone was going to die, he could be of great value, right? He could be research. A human textbook. Study me in my slow and patient demise. Watch what happens to me. Learn with me. Morrie would walk that final bridge between life and death and narrate the trip.” ¹

Which Brings Us Back to Albom

Whom after seeing the Nightline episode was motivated to get back in touch with his old mentor. As fate would have it, there was a newspaper strike at the time which allowed Albom to make weekly trips from Detroit to Boston to visit Schwartz. So, every Tuesday for 14 weeks, Albom would meet with Schwartz who would once again become his teacher and impart nuggets of wisdom on life and death.

After Schwartz’s death, Albom went on to publish a New York Times bestselling book chronicling the interactions between life and death and the wisdom gleaned from those 14 meetings. The title of the book? You guessed it – Tuesdays with Morrie.

Today’s post will discuss 5 of the most important lessons from Tuesdays with Morrie from my perspective. After each lesson, I will ask a related question for all of us to ponder with respect to our own lives. Feel free to share your thoughts on how the questions relate to you and your life in the comments below.

Let’s now take a look at 5 important lessons from Tuesdays with Morrie:

 (1)  Giving out love and letting it come in

Early in the book, Morrie tells Albom the thing he has learned most with the disease is that “The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in.” ¹ Many people think they don’t deserve love and that if they let it in, they will become soft. He then recites a powerful quote that he repeats several times, “Love is the only rational act.” ¹

Do you give out enough love? Do you let enough love in?

(2)  Don’t Feel Sorry for Yourself

After seeing what he was going through, Albom asked Morrie if he ever felt sorry for himself. “I give myself a good cry if I need it. But then I concentrate on all the good things still in my life…Mitch, I don’t allow myself any more self-pity than that. A little each morning, a few tears, and that’s all.”

There are too many of us that spend time feeling sorry for ourselves even though self-pity does us no good. If Morrie, in his terrible condition didn’t feel sorry for himself, how about the rest of us?

Are there times when you spend too much time feeling sorry for yourself? If yes, how much better would you be if you put a daily limit on self-pity and instead worked to change things for the better?

(3)  Looking at Death Differently

During one of their Tuesday’s, they discussed death. “Everyone knows they’re going to die,” he said again, “but nobody believes it. If we did, we would do things differently.” ¹

He believed that you can be more involved in your life when you are living if you are prepared for death. His advice, “Do what the Buddhists do. Every day, have a little bird on your shoulder that asks, ‘Is today the day? Am I ready? Am I doing all I need to do? Am I being the person I want to be?” ¹

Is today the day for you? Are you ready? Have you done everything you have needed to do? Are you the person you want to be?

(4)  Worrying About Aging

Albom was at a point in his life where he was feeling over the hill, even though he was only in his mid-30’s. Morrie’s thoughts about why people don’t like aging is that it reflects unfilled and unsatisfied lives and that if you have meaning in your life you want to go forward, not back.

Being unhappy with aging is a losing battle as it’s going to happen anyway…if you are lucky.  One of the things he said that really struck me was, “You have to find what’s good and true and beautiful in your life as it is now. Looking back makes you competitive. And, age is not a competitive issue.” ¹

How do you feel about aging? Do you worry about it more than you should?

(5)  What Do You Want Your Tombstone to Say?

During one of their visits, Albom lifted up a newspaper to show Morrie one of the headlines which read, “I Don’t Want My Tombstone To Read “I Never Owned a Network”. The quote came from CNN founder Ted Turner who had been unsuccessful up to that point in purchasing CBS. This spurred a discussion between the two on what is really important in life? If Turner was dying like Morrie was, would he really give a crap about buying CBS?

Morrie went on to say, “There’s a big confusion in this country over what we want versus what we need. You need food, you want a chocolate sundae. You have to be honest with yourself. You don’t need the latest sports car, you don’t need the biggest house. The truth is, you don’t get satisfaction from those things. You know what really gives you satisfaction?” What? “Offering others what you have to give.” ¹

This particular discussion ended where it started and actually made me laugh out loud with Morrie asking Albom, “This Ted Turner guy,” Morrie said, “he couldn’t think of anything else for his tombstone?”

Do you put too much emphasis on wants versus needs in your life? How could you do a better job of offering others what you have to give?

Eventually, Morrie Schwartz Succumbed to His Disease

But not before doing a couple more interviews with Koppel and touching millions of lives in the process. If you are interested, you can check them out on YouTube, they are filled with wisdom and will really give you a different perspective on life.

Before We Go, Just to Close the Loop on Tombstones…

A little later in the book, Morrie finally lets Albom know what he wanted his tombstone to say, which was:

“A Teacher to the Last.”

Perfect!

Which brings me to the last question I will ask all of us to ponder…

What do you want your tombstone to say?

Until next time, remember – love is the only rational act and as always…PYMFP!
–Rick

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References

Albom, M. (1997). Tuesdays with Morrie: An old man, a young man, and life’s greatest lesson. New York: Doubleday.