This is How to Get Out of Your Comfort Zone!
I am going to start this blog post by taking you back to a weekend back in 2010 when my sister and her husband paid a visit to South Florida to visit yours truly. I believe by that time they were married and no longer living in sin. There is no reason for me to mention the fact they were living in sin in this post other than to make my Mom cringe a little bit if/when she reads this – sorry Mom, love you!
Anyways, one of the things I like most about my brother-in-law, Tim, is that he is an adventurous guy. So, one of the first things he wanted to do on their trip was to head down to the Everglades to check out the alligators. It sounded like a good idea to me! So, the next day the 3 of us got in my Jeep and made the short trek south to the Everglades.
We ended up at the Everglades Alligator Farm and after walking around for a bit we decided to check out a snake show. The show began, and there were probably a couple of hundred people in the audience – with the 3 of us sitting near the back. All-of-a-sudden the snake guy running the show pulled out a red box and proceeded to ask for a volunteer. Of course, no one volunteered knowing full well what was in that red box, seeing as it was a snake show and all. Undeterred, he proceeded to go ahead and pick someone from the audience.
The person he picked? Yup, you guessed it – me!
I’m not going to lie, I am not the biggest fan of snakes – like, I REALLY do not like them. So, of course, the first thought that went through my mind was ‘crap! really? me?’. But then for some reason, another thought entered my mind, that being – ‘dude, sometimes you need to suck it up and step out of your comfort zone’. For the next several seconds, those 2 thoughts engaged in an epic battle in my mind…
Which thought prevailed? Well, you will have to wait until the end of the blog post to find out!
Comfort Zones
They are something we all have, and while the size of each of our comfort zones differs, we all have them. According to Alasdair A.K. White, author of From Comfort Zone to Performance Management, “A comfort zone is a psychological state in which things feel familiar to a person and they are at ease and in control of their environment, experiencing low levels of anxiety and stress. In this zone, a steady level of performance is possible.” 1
A comfort zone is, in essence, a behavioral space that possesses a familiar routine and pattern that is free of risk, thus minimizing stress and anxiety. This helps us by ensuring we are free of anxiety, experience reduce stress and are happy.
While comfort zones do have some positive benefits and can be a healthy adaptation for our lives as we have seen, they also have some negative aspects. You see, to grow, transition, and transform yourself it is necessary to step out of your comfort zone from time to time.
Why do you need to get out of your comfort zone?
There are a bunch of other reasons to get out of your comfort zone, with some being to:
Open up a whole world new possibilities
And things about ourselves that we did not know existed and to fulfill our personal and professional potential – we get to see what we are made of!
Acquire new skills
And to learn new things.
Make us happier
According to Gretchen Rubin, author of Better Than Before, sometimes we want to keep doing the same thing to make our lives as easy as possible: “But often we’re happier, we feel more energetic, more productive, more creative when we try something new, when we challenge ourselves a little bit, when we kind of get out of that comfort zone. That atmosphere of growth can really boost our happiness.”
Be more productive
Sometimes we need a bit of unease and discomfort to meet deadlines and expectations.
Become more adaptable
By getting used to taking risks and being uncomfortable we put ourselves in situations where we need to adapt, which prepares us for when unexpected stuff happens.
New experiences and opportunities
If all we do is stay in our safe little cocoon we may be missing out on new experiences and opportunities.
We grow!
Taking risks opens you up to making a mistake or failing – but that is how you learn and grow – by making mistakes! You don’t learn from success!!!
It helps us deal with change in our life
When you get out of your comfort zone, you open yourself up to some type of change. This can only help you down the road as you get accustomed to dealing with and welcoming change in your life.
Gives you confidence
When you get out of your comfort zone whether you succeed or fail gives you a ton of confidence just by doing something. You learn that you can do it! And if you do it once, you can do it again!
It helps keep you sharp mentally as you get older
Lead researcher Denise Park of the University of Texas at Dallas shows: “It seems it is not enough just to get out and do something—it is important to get out and do something that is unfamiliar and mentally challenging, and that provides broad stimulation mentally and socially. When you are inside your comfort zone you may be outside of the enhancement zone.”
Meeting new people
When you step out of your comfort zone, many times you will be exposed to and meet all kinds of people you would not have met had you stayed in your comfort zone. 3
It can help us focus better
We focus best when the task is 4% harder than our skillset – which is just a bit outside our comfort zone. It helps release chemicals cortisol and norepinephrine which will help us pay attention better. They say 4% is the sweet spot because it releases just a little bit of norepinephrine, which comes with anxiety, but not too much which is associated with fear and blocks flow.
Does the Comfort Zone Have a Limit?
The short answer is yes.
The long answer goes back to some early research done by a pair of psychologists – Robert Yerkes and John D. Dodson. They explained that while you need a relative amount of comfort to create steady performance, you also need a little bit of anxiety mixed in there – enough to where your stress levels are higher than normal. This anxiety is what they call ‘Optimal Anxiety’ and it lies just outside of your comfort zone in the optimal performance zone. According to the researchers, “Anxiety improves performance until a certain optimum level of arousal has been reached. Beyond that point, performance deteriorates as higher levels of anxiety are attained.” 2 Outside of the optimum performance zone, lies the “danger zone”, this is where your performance decreases rapidly due to the influence of greater anxiety.
So, the key takeaway here is that you need to challenge yourself to get to the next level of whatever it is you want to do – but too much can increase anxiety and cause a negative result – which will just reinforce the idea that challenging yourself is not a good idea.
How to Get Out of Your Comfort Zone – Use it or Lose It
So, as I said the idea is to challenge yourself enough that you enter the optimal performance zone without hitting the danger zone. There are several ways you can do this:
(1) Start small and take baby steps
Think about people who climb mountains – they don’t start with Mount Kilimanjaro. They start with small mountains, build up a tolerance and slowly progress. The idea is to slowly increase your tolerance where you find your ‘optimal anxiety’ that allows you to progress and surpass your tolerance and keep climbing that mountain! Take steps that are a bit unfamiliar, but not too emotionally challenging.
(2) Be curious
The more curious you are, the more you are going to want to try new things.
(3) Find Your ‘Why’
By figuring out why whatever endeavor you want to undertake is important to you. If your “why” is strong enough, it will help you fight through whatever fear is holding you back. Remember, sometimes the fear we anticipate is much greater than the actual fear.
(4) Stop rationalizing
By asking yourself the following question – “if I could make this anxiety go away, is this something I would really be excited to do?”. If the answer is yes, it will help you distinguish stuff you are rationalizing as not important from stuff that you would like to be able to do – if you could just get out of your comfort zone. Don’t make excuses and don’t rationalize! You will know when you are making excuses and rationalizing.
(5) Take the advice of Eleanor Roosevelt
Who famously said: “Do one thing every day that scares you.”
(6) Be spontaneous
Sometimes you just need to throw caution to the wind and do it!
Before We Go…
Let’s go back to my snake show story. So, I had to make a quick decision – fake a heart attack or accept the snake guy’s indecent proposal.
For whatever reason, I took my own pieces of advice #5 and #6 from the section above and headed down to accept my fate – whatever it was.
My heart was racing, knowing that either I would conquer my fear or be lunch for whatever was in the red box. Either way, one thing was clear – I was about to get outside my comfort zone!
I introduced myself and shook the snake guy’s hand.
He then asked me ‘what does red stand for?”, motioning to the red box.
“Danger?”, I asked with a soft whimper as my eyes squinted and my nose crinkled.
“Correct”, he said.
He then pulled a white bag out of the box.
“What do you think is in the bag?”, he asked.
“Seeing as how we are at a snake show, I am going to go out on a limb and guess a snake”, I sarcastically shot back.
“Correct, what hand do you use to write?”, he asked.
After telling him that I was a lefty, he told me to reach into the bag with my right hand and pull out the snake.
“This dude is not just a snake man, but he’s also a comedian – NOT!”, I thought to myself!
So, I took a deep breath and said to myself ‘here goes nothing’, as my life flashed before my eyes, and reached into the danger-filled bag…
And pulled this badboy out…
And you know what, it wasn’t so bad after all – and I am glad I did it.
Sometimes, you just need to get out of your comfort zone!
Until next time, take a deep breath, get out of your comfort zone, and as always…PYMFP!
–Rick
Use It or Lose It – Get Out of Your Comfort Zone!
Some ways to get out of your comfort zone:
Start small and take baby steps.|
Be curious.
Find your “Why”.
Stop rationalizing and making excuses!
Take the advice of Eleanor Roosevelt and do one thing a day that scares you!
Be spontaneous
A few ideas on things you can do to get out of your comfort zone:
Try different things every day – food, routes, books, exercises, podcasts.
Volunteer.
Call a friend you haven’t said hi to for a while.
Wear different clothes.
Learning new languages.
Travel.
When to Use It:
When you want to get out of your comfort zone!
What Do You Think?
Do you have a hard time getting out of your comfort zone? Are there any other tricks you use to get out of your comfort zone? Please share in the comments below!
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References
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/between-cultures/201612/how-leave-our-comfort-zones
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/in-flux/201512/5-benefits-stepping-outside-your-comfort-zone
https://www.inc.com/danny-iny/what-science-says-about-going-outside-your-comfort-zone.html
https://hbr.org/ideacast/2017/02/escape-your-comfort-zone.html
3 Kwik Brain Podcast – Episode #46 – How to Train Focus and Flow with Steven Kotler
1 Alasdair A. K. White “From Comfort Zone to Performance Management”
2 Yerkes, R & Dodson, J. – “The Dancing Mouse, A Study in Animal Behavior” 1907 “Journal of Comparative Neurology & Psychology”, Number 18, pp 459–482
I would have made the fastest exit ever if I had to deal with that snake situation!
I agree that anxiety often accompanies tasks that are out of our comfort zone. For me, my first time at the gym, public speaking at the board office etc. were occasions that produced anxious moments. It is true that once the initial tension disappears, one feels more confident and self – assured. You often reach a comfort zone with what was once awkward and initially uncomfortable.
Hi Eileen, That’s a great way to put it, you often reach a comfort zone with what was once awkward and initially uncomfortable – I love it. Then I suppose the idea is to stretch a bit more outside the new comfort zone and on and one – that is how we grow and improve. Great comment. Thanks, Rick
Hello Rick. Its called a Comfort Zone for a reason. The brain subconsciously tells you “if you do (whatever) you are at high risk to be injured, crippled, bitten by something, or get killed. Don’t be an idiot.” It’s a simple risk analysis.
Which is why I will not ever go parachute jumping, bungee jumping, motorcycle riding, alligator hunting, mountain climbing….and the list goes on. At my age, getting out of my comfort zone means visiting a store I have never been to before. I like my cocoon, its nice and cozy. And by the way, the snakes would not bother me at all. I’ve handled snakes (non-poisonous) way back when as a kid. I know how to hold the snake – the trick is to grab the head in a certain way so that the head cannot move.
Hey Dave, I think we have a different definition of comfort zone. There is no doubt that you don’t want to put yourself in danger, of course. When I say comfort zone, I am saying pushing yourself a little beyond your limits so that you can improve yourself and grow or overcome fears. Hope you had a great weekend. Your 49ers are looking good, nice win against Arizona yesterday, close call but they came through in the end. Take care, Rick