46 Nuggets of Important Advice to My Younger Self

For those of you who read my blog posts often you know that I like to joke around and keep things light and funny, (or so I think) while covering different topics related to self-improvement.

Today I am going to be a bit more serious and give some advice to my younger self.

I know, sometimes I even shock myself!

I think and reflect A LOT.

It helps me from getting caught up in the minutia of life by seeing the big picture, and to help ensure I am doing the right things with my priorities in order.

Recently I did a self-reflection exercise that I would like to share with you. Turning 46 a few months ago, it really hit me how quickly times flies. It seems like just yesterday I was 21, playing college football and doing a lot of the stupid stuff that comes with the territory. Attending my Dad’s retirement party a few weeks ago made me realize that in the same amount of time that has transpired from being that kid in college to now, I will be the same age as my parents and their retired friends.

It’s crazy to think about

But time really does pass in the blink of an eye – that is, if you are lucky.

My reflection consisted of writing down 46 pieces of advice to my younger self.  Some of it has been learned the hard way by making mistakes, some of it has been advice given to me by my parents, friends, or mentors and some of it has been learned through observation.

Sometimes we need to learn by making mistakes ourselves. But we are going to make enough mistakes as it is, so why make them if we can learn from someone else’s mistakes?

The following nuggets of advice to my younger self are aimed more at younger readers of Prime Your Pump, but hopefully, there is something that everyone can get out of them.

So here we go, in no particular order; 46 pieces of advice to my younger self.

(1)  Be yourself and do not change for anyone

If someone doesn’t like you as you are, it is their problem. Be you and don’t change for anyone – except yourself.

(2)  Be a leader

Don’t wait for someone else to take the lead. If something needs to be done, do it. Set the right example. Encourage others. Be supportive. Help people.

 (3)  People will come, and people will go.

The people you hang out with at various stages of your life will change. Some will be there for the long haul and some will come and go. That’s just life. Learn something from all of them.

(4)  Life is about experiences and money is better spent on experiences than material things.

Spending money on experiences gives great memories, changes your perspective on things and helps you learn. Most of the rest of it just collects dust. Try different things, go to different places, meet different people, eat different foods.

(5)  Stop caring about what other people think

Do what you think is right and let your moral compass and personal mission statement govern your actions. Not always caring about what others think is very freeing.

(6)  Time stops for no one and is one of the most important things we have

As I said in the introduction, it truly is amazing how quickly time passes. I know it may sound cliché – but enjoy every day. Check out this powerful graphic!

(7)  What you do when no one is watching

It’s what you do when no one is watching that is important. Anyone can rise to the occasion when people are watching.

(8)  Everyone has insecurities

We all have them, some of us have less of them, but we all have them. The key is not to let them control you.

 (9)  There are assholes out there, but generally, people are good

Of course, there are some people who are bad people, but I have found that in general, most people are good.

(10)  Do stuff you love

Seeing as how time is such a valuable resource, why would you spend any of it doing shit you don’t like? Of course, there is shit in life you have to do that sucks like paying bills and going to funerals, the point is to minimize doing stuff you don’t want to do.

(11)  Shit happens, it’s how you react and handle it

We all go through adversity in our lives. It’s less about what happens and more about how you react to it and handle it. Fall down 68 times, get up 69 times!

(12)  Don’t be so quick to judge others, you don’t know what they are going through

Is that girl in front of you in line a bitch for not smiling back? Or is it possible she may be going through something very difficult in her life? Check out this video from Cleveland Clinic on empathy, it is extremely powerful.

(13)  Nothing is ever as good as it seems or as bad as it seems

Life is a long journey with many ups and many downs, you will see many of both. Try not to get too high or too low.

(14)  Tomorrow is another day

We all have bad days. The good news is that when you have a bad day just remember tomorrow is another chance to kick some ass – and you usually will.

(15)  If something is important enough you will make time for it

And when someone says they are too busy to do something it usually means it isn’t important enough. We always make time for things that are important.

(16)  Sleep is critical, get enough of it

Sleep is one of the most important things to ensure your mental and physical well-being.

(17)  Make time for play

Another thing I learned from my mentor Howie. Make time every day for some type of play.

(18)  Character trumps a lot of stuff

This goes for protecting your own character as well as people you associate with.  People with true character will rarely let you down.

(19)  EQ over IQ

IQ is something you are born with.  EQ is something you can and should work at developing. I’ve known a lot of smart people who weren’t successful because their EQ sucked.

NOTE: EQ is emotional quotient, in case you don’t know and it refers to how adept you are in such areas as self-awareness, empathy and dealing with others.

(20)  If you have 10 true friends in your life, you are super lucky

Be grateful for and work at improving your friendships.

(21)  Being polite and having manners goes a long way

I’m grateful that my parents raised me in a way to be polite and have manners. It is one of the first things I notice in someone else. To me, being polite and having manners can tell you a lot about the type of person someone is. If you want to make a quick read on someone watch how they treat waiters or waitresses.

(22)  Be a gentleman

Treat women with respect and how you would want someone to treat your sister or mother. Open doors, help people in need, lead by example.

(23)  Take care of your health

Without your health you have nothing, do whatever you can to take care of it.

(24)  Success leaves clues

You don’t need to reinvent the wheel. Look at what others have done and replicate it, with some modifications of course.

(25)  Get some form of exercise every day

Exercise is not only good for the body it is good for the mind.  As an added bonus, I often get my best ideas when working out.

(26)  The importance of being open-minded

Taking time to look at things from different points of view will often make you change what you originally thought about something or someone.

(27)  Taking time to think and reflect

Take time every day to sit back and think about the big picture. Be wary of getting caught up in the rat race.

(28)  Never stop learning

Learning can never stop, be curious and always learn new things.

(29)  Help others and don’t be afraid to ask for help

Doing stuff for others without expecting anything else in return is just a good way to live. And don’t be afraid to ask others for help.

(30)  Embrace diversity

We are all different and can learn so much from other people’s cultures, experiences, and backgrounds. Don’t just be open to but seek out friendships with people that are different – ages, races, background, and sexual orientations.

(31)  Don’t gossip

It is extremely unproductive. I read a great quote recently, “Small minds discuss people, average minds discuss events, great minds discuss ideas”.

(32)  Be kind

If I were ordering this list of nuggets of advice to my younger self in terms of importance, this would probably be #1. To me, being kind may be the most valuable trait someone can have. Who cares how successful you are or how much money you have if you are an asshole?

(33)  Travelling really changes your perspective

I haven’t traveled as much as I want to lately, but I plan to travel much more in the future. Every time I travel it really changes my perspective and changes me as a person.

(34)  The importance of discipline

I believe discipline is simply planning to do something and then following through. Which is one of the reasons I have much admiration and respect for those in the military who serve us – talk about discipline!

(35)  Be grateful

Just appreciating and being thankful for what you have every day. How can you expect anything else if you aren’t grateful for what you currently have?

(36)  Abundance

The fact there is more than enough of everything for all of us. Be happy for and applaud others success. Someone elses success doesn’t make you any less of a person.

 (37)  Controlling ‘the controllables’

There is no use in getting all worked up about shit you cannot control. Focus on what is within your control.

 (38)  Switch things up that aren’t working

If something isn’t working, maybe it is time to switch things up. Shit won’t change by magic.

(39)  Do not accumulate credit card debt and don’t live beyond your means

Those high-interest rates will kill you. If you can’t afford it, don’t buy it. People don’t care what you have, and if they do they probably aren’t the kind of people you want to have in your life.

(40)  Never get complacent

Whether it is in your job, your relationships, your health – whatever, winners don’t get complacent. Keep striving to get better.

(41)  Don’t ever let anyone tell you that you can’t do something.

They may be haters, or they may be jealous. Either way, screw ‘em and prove them wrong. That being said, I will never be in the NBA! But I am in pretty good shape and pretty good at twerking, so being a Chippendale is still within my reach!

(42)  Cheating

Don’t cheat on someone. End the relationship and move on. And that goes for all areas of your life, cheating is cutting corners and taking the easy way out. Do things the right way, you will sleep better at night. This also goes for cheaters.  If someone cheats on their spouse, I don’t want anything to do with them. Because if they have cheated on the person who trusts them the most who’s to say they won’t jerk me over at some point?

(43)  Body language

Learn as much as you can about body language. It’s important for how others perceive you. It is also a great skill to have when trying to read and deal with others.

(44)  Confidence

The importance of confidence cannot be stated enough, and a lot of success in life stems from what is in your head. A .350 hitter thinks like a .350 hitter and a .200 hitter thinks like a .200 hitter. So, if you want to be a .350 hitter you need to think like one. Act as if.

(45)  Smile

You never know whose day you may make. The simple act of smiling at and being friendly with everyone you come across will also allow you to meet more people and make more friends.

(46)  Have fun!

Don’t take yourself too seriously.  Have fun and laugh every day!

So, that’s it! 46 pieces of advice to my younger self

What are some pieces of advice you would give to your younger self? I challenge you to sit down and write down a list of things you have learned through experience, mistakes or however else, it is a great exercise in reflection. Then if you are comfortable enough to do it, please share it with us in the comments below.

Until next time, keep reflecting, thanks for reading and as always…PYMFP!
–Rick

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