You’re Fired! 10 Things This Mofo Learned By Getting Fired

It has only happened to me once in my life…at least so far!

And that is, hearing the words that no one wants to hear…

…’We are no longer in need of your services’.

Yep, my career as a male exotic dancer was over and my lifelong dream was crushed! Apparently, my twerking skills left a lot to be desired.

Ok, I’m teasing about the job, but I am not teasing about getting fired. Let’s just go ahead and substitute ‘male exotic dancer’ in the previous sentence with ‘healthcare executive’ and move along with the story. Sorry, sometimes my immaturity gets the best of me.

Anyway, I can still hear the inner monologue that was going on in my head as the whole thing went down as if it were yesterday…

’Wait, am I really getting fired?’

Ok, truth be told those weren’t exactly the words I was using, it was more like…

‘Wait, is this mofo really firing me?’

Hang on, before I go any further I should probably clarify something. Technically I was ‘laid off’ due to ‘corporate restructuring’ and my position was being eliminated.

And they did say they would ‘try’ to find me another lesser position if I was interested (which I was not). But to me, it’s the same shit – laid off/fired, tomayto/tomahto!

Depending on the situation, restructuring and eliminating a position is simply an easier and cleaner way of letting someone go, especially if you don’t have documented proof that they have done a shitty job.

Sometimes, a new big boss comes in and wants their own people – which I totally get by the way. If my ass was on the line, I would want my own people too.

So, instead of firing people, they simply ‘restructure’ and get rid of the high salaried people they don’t want on their team. I know this firsthand because I had done it myself in my career.

Was this karma coming back to bite me in the ass?

Perhaps. But I chose to simply see it as part of business and part of life.

The point of this post is not to get your sympathy. And it’s not for you to say that I had it coming to me, even though you may be right!  The fact of the matter is that getting fired, laid off, dumped, rejected is something we will all go through at some point in our lives – and probably multiple times.

In my opinion, it’s more about how we learn from and respond to shit like this happening to us, than it is about the fact that it happened. And THAT is the point of this post, what I learned from my experience of getting fired.

So, with all that introductory stuff out of the way, let’s look at some of the things this mofo learned from getting fired.

(1)  You learn who your true friends are!

It is at times like these where you learn who your true friends are. I cannot tell you how many people called or texted within hours (clearly good news travels fast! ha!) to offer support and new job opportunities, which was incredibly kind and appreciated. There were also some who I never heard from again, and that’s cool too.

(2)  I’m glad I listened to a colleague years ago

When I was a younger whipper-snapper, I had a colleague who gave me some of the best advice I have ever received. His advice was to always have at least 8 months to a year’s salary saved – just in case ‘something’ happens. He also said not to live beyond your means. I haven’t always listened to other people’s advice, but those are 2 pieces of advice that I did listen to and boy am I ever glad I did!

(3)  It didn’t hurt as much as I thought it would

I was more shocked and surprised than anything, it was almost as if…’how could they not want the GREAT me?!?!’ I think part of the reason it didn’t bother me that much was because unlike for some people, the job was not my identity. The credit for that goes to my parents for raising me to understand that no matter what, no person or situation should ever have control over you or define you.

(4)  It humbled me

And let me know that maybe I am not as great as I think I am! But then again it also taught me that…

(5)  You cannot take things personally and maybe I am still great!

And maybe the person who fired me was incompetent. It’s entirely possible. Just because a person is put in a position of authority doesn’t mean they know what they are doing, so you cannot let it affect your sense of self.

(6)  Perhaps the truth lies somewhere between #4 and #5

There is no doubt that I can always improve in every area of my life, but just because one person doesn’t want me, doesn’t mean I suck. It’s just their opinion and what they thought was right at the time.

(7)  It allowed me to step back and look at the big picture

When I took some time to look back at it, I was trading time for money, working insane hours, with no life. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying there is anything wrong with it. How could I? I did it myself.

I just realized that upon reflection, there are more important things in life and that this change would benefit me in the long run.

(8)  There are much worse things that could have happened

I was alive, healthy, handsome, talented (although my twerking needed some work) and thanks to listening to my colleague’s advice years before, financially stable. There are so many people out there that are not so fortunate.

(9)  That you need to handle things with dignity and class.

Just because you don’t agree with someone’s decision, being an asshole isn’t going to help anyone. It’s also not a good idea to burn bridges as you never know where someone may appear in your life down the line.

(10)  When one door closes, another door opens.

The thing that excited me the most was that the next adventure of my life was one I would be able to think about and choose. After much thought and reflection, I found something that really gets me excited – which is the blog you are reading right now.

So, in the end, getting fired was truly a blessing in disguise for this mofo.  Speaking of mofos, I was going to write a thank you card to the one who fired me because if he didn’t fire me I wouldn’t be on the path I am. The problem is…I’m not sure where he is these days, turns out he met the same fate as this mofo did…

So, that’s it! That’s what I learned from getting shit-canned!

Excuse me, what did you say? Shit-canned isn’t a real word?

Oh well, what are you going to do?  Fire me?

Too late mofos, too late!

Until next time, thanks for reading, and as always…PYMFP!
–Rick

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