Being Proactive to Minimize the Chance of Sh*t Happening
In today’s column, you will learn about a tool called proactive maintenance; or being proactive to minimize the chance that “shit happens”.
In life, “shit happens” – stuff goes wrong and most of the time we simply…react. And most of time, it’s not even our fault – many things in our life have a limited shelf life, or they simply break down after a while because… “shit happens”.
Of course, it is important to fix something when it goes wrong, however there are high costs of operating in reactive mode. These reactions usually come with various types of costs: waiting time to get whatever fixed, financial cost, inconvenience cost, etc.
And the really “shitty” part is that these things always seem to happen at the most inopportune time, for example:
You run out of gas just as you are already late to an important ‘meeting’ with your mistress.
There are 2 outs in the 9th inning and your team is up to bat with the winning run in scoring position or perhaps you are watching the final episode of the Bachelor and she is about to announce the winner and then bam – power surge hits, power strip is old and has stopped working…Damn!
You realize you have run out of toilet paper right in the middle of a big dump. Seeing as how desperate times call for desperate measures you quickly reach for the Wall Street Journal, hoping your spouse has already read the ‘Politics’ section.
Listen, sometimes, you cannot avoid “shit” happening, however, there are things you can do to reduce the number of times “shit happens” by using proactive maintenance and by being proactive.
Proactive maintenance is performed to prevent failures of stuff happening in your life by:
Taking care of things before they deteriorate.
Replacing parts that may have a limited shelf life before they fail.
Testing things to make sure they are still working as they should, so they don’t fail later.
Here are some examples of ‘shit happens’ that may occur in your life, with the reason they happened and proactive maintenance ideas that by being proactive would have prevented them from happening:
Shit Happened #1: Your power bill is 15% higher than it should be. If that wasn’t bad enough, your A/C fails on the hottest day of the year – when you are seriously hungover after one too many blowjobs (I am referring to the shot by the way).
Reason: You haven’t been changing your AC filter on a monthly basis.
Idea for next time: – Tie it to something you do every month and proactively do it at the same time (every time you pay rent/mortgage or utility bill, when your monthly friend is in town etc.)
Shit Happened #2: Your neck pain is not due to stress caused by your ex-husband being a dick, it is due to the pillow losing its shape. You are sneezing due to those nasty little dust mites crawling all over your face while you are sleeping.
Reason: You are using an old pillow (pillows usually only last 3 years at most).
Idea for next time: Have a book and proactively enter when you buy certain household things (towels need replacing too as washing machine don’t kill bacteria), so you know when to replace them.
Shit Happened #3: Your knees, shins and ankles are always sore from running.
Reason: You are using shoes that are worn out and no longer have proper cushion.
Idea for next time: Proactively buy new shoes after 250-300 miles.
Shit Happened #4: You get a cavity because you are not cleaning your teeth properly, plus you are at risk of germs and mold!
Reason: You are using an old toothbrush. And while we are on the subject, don’t forget to floss!
Idea for next time: Replace it after 3 months!
Shit Happened #5: You are about to have some well-deserved ‘naughty’ time with Bob after a long day of work when he simply ‘stops responding’
Reason: Bob’s (your battery-operated boyfriend) batteries aren’t working and you don’t have any more.
Idea for next time: Have backup batteries or replace batteries every x number of months (this will depend on how much you and Bob see each other). This works with smoke detectors as well!
Shit Happened #6: Your hair looks the same as before you tried to dye it blonde.
Reason: Your hydrogen peroxide is 6 months old, after 2 months it turns to water, so sadly you are still a ‘peroxide brunette’.
Idea for next time: Go through your cabinet and get rid of anything which has gone past it’s expiry date. This includes sunscreen, toothpaste, perfume/cologne, and condoms (the gift that keeps on giving is not one you want to receive) amongst others.
Use It or Lose It:
To utilize proactive maintenance, there are certain strategies you can employ by being proactive:
Maintain and take care of things that are important to you, so they last longer.
Create a diary (or use an app or calendar on your phone) to help you keep track of when you bought certain things that won’t last forever or a schedule of when you need to replace things that you will know when to replace them.
Pay attention to expiry dates and do periodic inspections i.e. food in the fridge, medicine, toiletries to make sure their expiry date has not passed
You need to plan ahead and find the right balance, you cannot do proactive maintenance on everything in your life, but you can prioritize and figure out what makes sense.
When to Use ‘Preventive Maintenance by Being Proactive’:
When you don’t want something to fail at the last opportune time
To save time and money
To avoid inconvenient situations
Discuss…
What situations have you used preventative maintenance by being proactive in your personal life?
Thanks for reading and until next time, remember…PYMFP!
Rick
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Dear Mr. Bezos
Even with adequate advance preparations, shit still happens. But with appropriate forethought (not foreplay), the pile of shit is not as big nor does it smell as bad. Example……
In my feckless and wasted younger days, on a whim I bought a 1955 MG convertible. Very cramped inside, but still fun to drive with the wind whipping you in the face. There were several other classic MG owners in the area, who I sought out. Darn near everyone told me “always carry 2 quarts of oil and a spare fuel pump”. Having previous experience with old cars – I learned to drive on a 1929 Ford rumble seat coupe – I knew to always have tools in the storage compartment when on the road.
So, on a trip to San Diego, the car craps out. Coasting into a supermarket parking lot, I stopped, took a deep breath and thought “OK now what?” Tried re-starting the car. It turned over (battery is good), but still would not fire up. Begin with the ignition – power OK to both the coil and distributor. Then the fuel system – undo the fuel line leading to the carb, have my wife step on the gas pedal a few times – no gas comes out. Yes, it’s the fuel pump, and I have a spare! Now the English geniuses (is that an oxymoron?) who designed the 55 MG thought to themselves “Where can we locate the fuel pump so nobody can reach it”. The obvious answer was bolt it to the inside of the chassis just about the rear axle. So for the next hour, I’m laying on my back under the car with my nose almost touching the rear axle housing, blindly reaching up and around to loosen the nuts and bolts that attach the old fuel pump. Gas is dripping on me, crud and dirt falling on my face, but I am able to remove the old pump. Now to reverse the process and install the spare, which surprisingly was easier than removing the old dead one. Connect up all the fuel lines, crawl out from underneath, and try to start the car. VROOM!!
Yes, shit did happen, but I had prepared a recovery plan in advance. It definitely felt better to have a running car even though I looked and stunk like something the cat dragged in. Way much better than being clean and neat, but having a dead car and calling AAA to tow me, then pay some astronomical mechanic’s fee. On the way back home, we stopped in Santa Barbara, headquarters of the largest MG aftermarket parts manufacturer, and bought another fuel pump; trading the dead one in as a core charge.
Yes, shit can happen. But you can mitigate it with a little advance planning. Then when the shit unexpectedly does happen, it won’t be so bad. Is there such a thing as expected shit happening?
And regarding the MG – I never needed to replace the fuel pump again. I kept the car for 19 years, then sold it to pay for 2 years of my daughter’s college education.
Great story Dave! Thanks for sharing!